While not an exhaustive list of all reasons, these are the top reasons given for failed marriages in North American today.
Infidelity (over 20% of divorces)
Irreconcilable Differences (growing apart)
Drugs / Alcohol
It’s interesting to note how many of these can be avoided with proper relationship maintenance. Too often we wait until our relationships are so far gone, the energy and effort required for repair seem to outweigh the rewards of salvaging what we once held so dear. Money problems are thought to be a common catalyst, and it makes our list, but “money problems” actually account for under 3% of divorces. It’s possible that even this “deal breaker” could be avoided with the help of a good marriage counselor as it often is an extension of other problems that are addressable, such as communication, respect, and cooperation.
What types of problems should be reason for divorce? It’s difficult to use a blanket statement, but there’s little chance you should consider staying in a relationship with someone that’s been physically abusive to you. Statistically speaking, they’re very likely to repeat this action which is an unconditional declaration of their lack of love or regard for you and your wellbeing. If you can’t think clearly enough on this for yourself, by all means please seek help as soon as possible. Family, clergy, your local shelter, your doctor, or just about anyone can be a resource for escaping this highly dangerous situation.
Much like changing the oil in your car, a good relationship tune-up can help keep what you cherish today, valuable for the long haul. Want to put the spark back in your relationship? Want to feel the desire and friendship you’ve been missing? Don’t wait for major repairs to sneak up on you. Don’t wait for reasons for divorce to outweigh your reasons to stay together. Contact us for a relationship tune-up!